Madonna Snaps at Brit Awards; Kills Four Bull-Costumed Male Dancers with Bare Hands in Drug-Fueled Episode While Performing on Stage

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Gruntington Post[London, UK] – A tragic event happened during the closing act of Tuesday’s Brit Awards when Madonna suddenly began acting strangely. She was performing her song “Taurus Love” while dressed as a matador, surrounded by male dancers in bull costumes. When she was almost through the song, she stumbled briefly on the stairs. For a moment she seemed mesmerized by the stylized bull horns dancing rhythmically around her. Then she just snapped.
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“It was bloody horrible. And actually really bloody,” said stage worker Rupert Swindle afterward. It’s like she got ahold of some bad ice and really thought she was in the ring with all those bulls. She started piledriving them and throwing them around. Then she started ripping the fake horns off their heads, and then ripping other things. Those poor girly blokes didn’t have a chance.” He wasn’t exaggerating. At one point, the cameras captured her twisting one dancer’s head off using only her enormous, muscular thighs.

Afterwards, Madonna’s personal doctor made a statement that “absolutely no drugs were involved, except for some legal steroids and the heavy use of female hormone replacement therapy drugs,” which he claimed were necessary due to the performer’s advanced age.

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About GruntOfMonteCristo

Fearless and Devout Catholic Christian First, Loving Husband and Father Second, Pissed-Off Patriot Third, Rocket Engineer Dork Last.
This entry was posted in Europe, Humor. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Madonna Snaps at Brit Awards; Kills Four Bull-Costumed Male Dancers with Bare Hands in Drug-Fueled Episode While Performing on Stage

  1. Adrienne says:

    Funny photoshops, Grunt. What is wrong with these people that they just can’t quit? She’s 56 years old. She needs a new hobby.

  2. The things I miss by not having a television!

    Wait.

    Never mind. I don’t miss it at all.

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