The Caitlyn Thing

CateAccording to the Vanity Fair article, Bruce had a lot to hide, but “Caitlyn has nothing to hide.” Ummmmm. Perhaps he feels that way, but how do you write that kind of line with a straight face? The list of things he would have to choose to “hide” or “disclose” to some guy “she” just met at a bar is truly epic. I think those XY chromosomes you’re still carrying around are being hid with a great deal of effort and medical cunning, there, Caitlyn.

I’m actually pretty sympathetic to the gender-confused, like Bruce. I’ve known a couple people who struggled with it, and I’ve never condemned anybody. But how do you tell a friend that you support them doing something like this to themselves? Nobody gets to choose what sex they are, and nobody gets to decide what lifestyle will make them happy. That’s GIVEN to you. Internal conflict is NOT given to you. That, you provide yourself.

Everybody gets voices in their heads telling them they “need” this or that to be happy. Sometimes the temptation is very strong, but the source must be considered. How many of us have been told destructive things by that voice? Lots. How many guys have been told by that voice that “the stripper over there really likes you and the money has nothing to do with it?” Should you go believe that voice? Hell no. Should you go marry that stripper overnight and give her an extra key to the Lambo right away? Well, that depends. I mean, what are Lambos for except for your busty stripper girlfriend to go buy heroin in so that you end up in jail and eventually turn your life around. Circle of life. 😉

The lie that we’re expected to believe here is that Bruce’s voice comes from God. That God has been telling him for 50 years that he totally f&#$ed up. “Look, Bruce, I’m really sorry, but Raphael is a huge joker and he mixed up your files and we gave you a dick by mistake. You were really meant to have a vagina and be a slutty cover model. Do you think you can earn enough money to get this medically corrected so you can have a shot at being happy? I apologize, but you may need to marry into the Kardashian family to make it happen. Sorry about that.”

But who knows, if Valerie Jarrett is supportive, then it must be the right thing, right?


About GruntOfMonteCristo

Fearless and Devout Catholic Christian First, Loving Husband and Father Second, Pissed-Off Patriot Third, Rocket Engineer Dork Last.
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8 Responses to The Caitlyn Thing

  1. Adrienne says:

    That picture is beyond creepy. I read somewhere that he plans on keeping his “winkie.” He also said he was always attracted to women and still is. Huh? Does that make him a lesbian with a penis now? I’m so confused.

    • You’re not the only one, A. And what part, exactly, does being on the Cover of Friggin’ Vanity Fair play in his own deep personal journey? No “Look At MEEEEEEEE” there at all, huh? You can’t go “feel like a woman” on the back deck while wearing a feather boa and sipping a Singapore Sling with an umbrella in it? The affirmation of your family isn’t enough? You need tweets from the WHITE HOUSE????

  2. Adrienne says:

    Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Seriously???? A tweet from the White House??? Dear Lord in Heaven – what has this world become?

  3. trailbee says:

    We hear what we wish to hear. I just heard I won Lotto. I am so excited. 🙂
    On a more serious note, do you think Caitlyn and Chelsea Manning communicate? At least we didn’t have to pay for Caitlyn’s operation and therapy.
    How very sad. This person has shed an entire life. I wonder if there is going to be a grieving process. I’m not kidding. Not all the medals in the world will bring him peace. At least 200 million Americans and a billion other planteers will see this blasted across the cyberworld. If it blows up in his face, it will be so public. Wow.

  4. Quote of the day from Gruntessa: “I’m not even related to him and that messes me up. I might need therapy.”

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