Contingency Shopping

Don’t get me wrong.  I think Trump will kick Hillary’s unholy butt in the general election.  But just in case she steals the election, I’m doing some clothes shopping now while the dollar can still purchase something.  Lord knows, those BigFurHat Molon Labe shirts of mine will be illegal after January 20th.  I figure this shirt won’t cause any trouble:


And the only tactical trousers I’ll be able to wear will be something like this, because it might be perceived as being gender neutral by the Federal Fashion Police.


And I figure I can sneak one of these by the censors as long as they don’t read it too carefully.


And this muffler shop shirt should be cool with the Gen3 Feminists.  They like it when everybody’s focus is just below the muff.  And when they’re exhausted, it’s harder to talk! Win-Win!


Eventually, of course, this one might be necessary.




About GruntOfMonteCristo

Fearless and Devout Catholic Christian First, Loving Husband and Father Second, Pissed-Off Patriot Third, Rocket Engineer Dork Last.
This entry was posted in Feminism, Hillary Clinton. Bookmark the permalink.

16 Responses to Contingency Shopping

  1. Adrienne says:

    I think more ammo would be a good idea!

    • I think we’re all working on that, too. But only in very small quantities, right Barack? Because “high-capacity magazines” are still illegal here in Colorado, thanks to our wonderful local Democrats (Pox Be Upon Them).

  2. Papabear says:

    One good thing about mooselim she-goat suicide bombers…they already have their body-bag on!

  3. LL says:

    I think that the “tactical kilt” would make a very positive statement in an LGBTQ bar… if accompanied with a leather wife beater in sort of a YMCA sort of ensemble.

    • Common misperception. There really are no such things as LGBTQ bars. They have separate bars, because the Ls don’t trust the Bs, the Gs think the Ls are bitches, the Ts don’t fit in anywhere and the Qs… well, they’re questionable. Trust me. I spent too many years in the SFBA. Also, I’d only accessorize with evil black hardware.

  4. woodsterman says:

    After reading this disgusting post I need my Safe Space!

  5. trailbee says:

    Well, thanks to everyone, all my lines are taken! I adore the Benghazi shirt. The tough muff is nothing. There is a contractor in my next town whose tailgate says: Your hole is our goal – uses fewer letters, faster easier to read in traffic and still gets the point across. LOL

  6. Terry says:

    Before I order I need to ask ;
    Do the tactical kilts have coordinating crotchless panties ?

    • No. That would defeat the purpose of the “next level of breathability.” Although, granted, not by much. 😉 However, there is an extra accessory available for Middle Eastern customer areas: The Steel Chain Mail Combo-Lock Briefs. I’ve heard they are essential in that part of the world.

  7. skybill says:

    Hi “Grunt,”
    I could not by-pass a comment after I saw the “Muffler shop shirt!!!!!”……YES!!!!!…..The sayin’ on the shirt is only part of the deal!!! …….So, Uncork a “Cold One,” pull up a chair and ……..”Picture if you will, a time, not that long ago when ‘Men were Men and Women were Proud of it!!’ your Sunday drive took you to a local Podunk Airport where some Men were walking around on the ramp, wearin’ mechanix coverall’s, bloused in Army Surplus Combat Boots, on their shoulder they carried a Korean War Vintage Parachute modified for ‘Sport Parachuting’ and were heading for the Cessna 172, engine turning up, waiting for them……Oh yes, they were wearin’ the old Football Helmet from their High School Daze that they used to “Bust thru that Paper on those Friday night Lights!!!(Right out of That George Straight Song!!!) …On the back of their “Jump Suit (Coverall’s) they got a local Seamstress to embroider their Club “LOGO!!” The Plot thickens’….They were…… “PARA STUDS, INC,” Yes, they actually got an,”INC.” since Skydivin’ was Dangerous and people were sue happy!!! But I digress…… They even had Business Cards!!! ,,,,,,I got one from Frank Goodman and I still have it in my archives!!!
    “PARA STUDS,INC.” “Qualified Skydivers for Sport and Exhibition Parachuting”
    “NO SKY TOO HIGH, NO MUFF TOO TUFF, (Reference the above photo)YOU CALL, WE FALL!!!!!!!!”
    “If it walks, talks or flies….we’ll jump it!!!!!”
    Today’s “Turbine Babies” have no clue!!!
    Blue Skies, Black Death!!!!,
    B-4240, C-3114, D-6009, SCR-2034, SCS-680, Air Trash- member in Good Standing,

  8. Brig says:

    OMGosh, Skybill that was great. Can I copy and send to my dad, with h/t to you of course. He would love this, he jumped for his 80th birthday…12 years ago…

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