Gruntington Post [Los Angeles] – Last week, singer Katy Perry failed to think of a novel or interesting way to throw her support behind Presidential candidate Hillary Clinton, so she decided to just go nude somewhere. Sensing a turf violation, the performer Madonna (the one former husband Guy Ritchie termed “F*&@ing Crazy”), insisted on also going nude for Hillary.
She didn’t stop there. During her performance at Barbra Streisand’s Brentwood estate theater, in front of approximately 50 Hollywood Democrats wearing washable smocks to protect against blood splatter, she performed ritual human sacrifice on all of her dancers.
Symbolically, in female solidarity with the Lady Candidate, all of the slaughtered dancers were male. Further, they were ritually beheaded using a sacred scimitar under strict halal code in solidarity with candidate Clinton’s many Saudi Arabian contributors present.
The event was followed by the usual statement by local law authorities and the FBI criticizing Mrs. Clinton and her supporters for “Extreme carelessness with human life,” but there were no charges brought.
Thank you for the factual account that the mainstream media overlooked.
You have no idea the sacrifice it takes to bring these horrors into the light of day. *shiver*
I heard that Bill Clinton was there at the orgy as well (but he didn’t make it into the lens of the Gruntington Post’s photographer apparently) demonstrating the “stop and frisk” techniques, which his wife objected to both in the debate on Monday and when she was First Lady.
He was there. But the pics were not exactly all family friendly…
Of course, to the delight of Hitlery’s preferred demographic of islamic savages, the sacrificial males were homosexual.
Of course! They were not, however, certified virgins. As far as we can report.
I might have to repost this instant classic.
If your readers aren’t too squeamish, be my guest, Parson! I’m not responsible if your cow goes dry or your fishing hole goes dead.
Madonna is such a dried up has-been, it’s hard to take her seriously. About anything.
She’s kind of a novelty now. Amusing, as long as you don’t look too close.
Well. Katy might be a bit rough to wake up to…what with that hair and bad breath…but, still. It’s there. Why not hit it.
But Madonna! Gimme some break dude! It’s old! It’s wrinkly! And…it’s old! (not to mention worn out) Althought I suppose that she is the perfect hillary! surrogate.
Dude. It’s dinnertime. I’m trying to snarf down these week old enchiladas. You’re not helping. Need more tequila…
OK Guys, There is no reason to revoke my man card. I have not linked to Madonna’s veins, teeth or her old shanky body. This is a retro Madonna type post – http://goodstuffsworld.blogspot.com/2014/05/goodstuffs-blogging-magazine-137th-issue.html
Hey, Goodstuff! No worries. We can always appreciate your retro stuff while still making fun of the Modern Madge, for many reasons. Thanks, Bro!
An ancestor of Muhdonnuh was unearthed in a dig recently and was called the Skankasaurus, (cave paintings also used the moniker “Coochie Mama”), and it has been determined this happened during the “Jerkrassic” period.
Probably! Either that or the Slutassius Period!
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