Advanced Blamestorming

You have to give her credit.  She’s creative and resourceful.

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She even blamed her own coughing fits on Trump.  Apparently, just thinking about him gives her hairballs.  But she’s not the only one.  Credit: NewsBusters.org.

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Pretty soon, it will even be showing up in children’s books.  At least this one is partly true.

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Posted in Elections, Hillary Clinton, Uncategorized | 30 Comments

Cultural Appropriation Alert: How Come Alicia Keys Gets to Wear a Turban?

Having been made newly aware of the horrible crimes being committed by people stealing cultural treasures from other ethnic groups by reading shitty valuable authors like Yasmin Abdel-Magied, I was duly shocked to watch The Voice tonight and see Alicia Keys wearing this:  WTF, right?

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aliciakeysdresshatsturbant_npkkaesjzlDon’t be fooled by the fact that Ms. Keys is only half white (from her Italian, Irish, Scottish mother).  Her other half still doesn’t come from anywhere that happened to invent the custom of turban-wearing.  Her father is from the Hell’s Kitchen part of NY City.  Not exactly Mecca or Punjab.  Here’s another from a different event (at right).

Let’s not forget that the cultural appropriation police do not exist solely to prevent Irish people from wearing sombreros and german-descended midwesterners from eating Thai food they don’t deserve.  This strange sect of social justice war-making (SJW) supposedly exists to protect ANY cultural heritage from being stolen and used by over-privileged people who are unrelated and undeserving of it.

panama2So, I say, massively-privileged and half-anglo Alicia Keys is wholly undeserving of wearing that goofy-looking turban.  Did she just convert to the Sikh religion?  Is it her grandmother’s ancestral Hell’s Kitchen sewing club turban?  Unlikely.  Is it one of her mother’s Italian family heirlooms?  Heh.  Don’t make me laugh.  If anything, it was more likely her Scottish heritage that’s responsible.  The Scots have always been innovative and tasteful in their fashion.  No lie.

But, it gets worse.  Much worse.  Do you see the headgear Ms. Keys is wearing to the left here?  It’s a Panama hat.  That’s right; invented in central America, another place where Alicia Keys from NY City has no claim of any cultural heritage whatsoever.  Will the madness never end???  Who will stop this inappropriate cultural headwear theft?  I’m sure if you asked anyone attending the Emmys the other night, they’d be quite sure it was Donald Trump’s fault.  Why not?  But I’m going to blame it on Michelle Obama.  She is the First Lady of Fashion, after all.  It’s her job, and no doubt many fashion crimes have been committed under her watch.  Most of them by her.

Posted in Hollyweird | 27 Comments

Bill Clinton Lost Nuclear Launch Codes Many Times; Think of How Well Hillary Would Protect Them When Faced With These Advanced Tortures

Posted in Hillary Clinton, War | 9 Comments

Some Crowd Comparisons

Here we are at Hillary’s “Come Back Tour” in Greensboro, NC, yesterday.  She brought in a couple hundred, including a few hecklers who urged her to do something anatomically impossible to herself.

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Here’s a Trump rally in about the same place in North Carolina a few days ago.  Thanks to C.W. Swanson for the images and the idea, BTW.

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Makes you feel sorry for Hillary’s campaign staff, doesn’t it?

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I just hope she doesn’t try to show us any more of her soul.  I don’t think we could take it.

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Posted in Elections | 28 Comments

New Music: ‘Take the Back Way Home,’ by SuperTrump

In honor of Adrienne’s theory about Hillary slipping out the back way at Chelsea’s place, and also inspired by Zilla’s “Super Trump” post today, I present a new Hillary song by the awesome group SuperTrump:

“Take the Back Way Home”

So you think you’ve got pneumonia?
Press just loves your bologna.
Take the back way home.
Take the back way home.

‘Cause you’re the joke of the neighborhood.
Still you say that you’re “feeling good.”
Take the back way home.
Take the back way home.

But there are times that you lose your grip on reality.
Oh calamity; you’re goin’ down, girl.
And then it turns out Bill’s still dicking bimbos on the
furniture; oh, it’s peculiar, he used to be so nice.

When you don’t want to leave a trace.
You take a trip out to Chelsea’s place.
And take the back way home.
Take the back way home.

You never see very much at all.
Forever shot full of propofol.
You take the back way home.
Take the back way home.

And when you’re up on the stage, it’s so unbelievable,
Oh forgettable, it’s only a matter of time
Hey! Da de da da,…

Sung to Roger Hodgson’s tune:

Posted in Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton, Music | 26 Comments

Hillary’s Metal Object Mystery Solved

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Gruntington Post (New York) – Speculation grew feverishly on Sunday about a mysterious metallic object that was clearly seen – and heard – on video falling from the cuff of Hillary Clinton’s pants leg as she was dragged into a waiting vehicle by aides after “not feeling well” during the 2016 World Trade Center Memorial event.

The mystery appears to be solved by a still photo taken by a bystander shortly after Clinton’s entourage roared off to daughter Hillary’s apartment but before NYPD officers were called to retrieve a “lost shoe” that was misplaced in the street during the incident.  The photo, shown above, indicates that the missing shoe was still attached to Hillary’s mechanical cyborg leg for minutes, standing upright in the street, until NYPD personnel retrieved it.  The small mystery cylindrical object is also visible in the photo, and appears to be a retaining pin or fastener that holds the leg in place on Hillary’s mechanical knee joint or perhaps her robot torso.

The photographer has not been named and said only, “Just take it.  I’m too young to be suicided or die mysteriously from natural causes.  Obamacare don’t pay for that, anyway.”

Posted in Hillary Clinton | 15 Comments

In New York on 9-11, It’s Not the Heat, It’s the Humidity

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Quote o’ the Day: “Steadiness.” – Hillary Clinton, when asked by Matt Lauer what the most important strength of a President should be.

Image | Posted on by | 9 Comments